My reflections on “Educated” by Tara Westover and the power of the beliefs we hold
Inspiring, resilient, real, emotional, reflective, powerful, thought awakening story. This is how I would describe this book. I loved it.
For a few months now I searched for the book, that would capture my attention and I would not be able to let it rest until I read all the pages. This was the book. I finished it in two sittings.
Three main reasons I loved it: this is a true story, it reminded me of me and my dad, and it related so much to the work I do with my clients on the power of beliefs.
I do not want to spoil the story if you will read the book and read you must. But I would like to write a few reflections.
As I am deeply interested in the coaching world and in psychology, especially why we are as we are, and why we think what we think and act as we do. I found many sentences in the book, which proved the power of our beliefs. I do not talk about religion or God of any kind. I mean the beliefs we hold about ourselves and the world around us.
“I´d been wondering how I could be a woman and yet be drawn to unwomanly things. “ One of the sentences from the book and the belief the author had about what is man´s job and where is woman´s place. In the kitchen… (Limiting belief number one).
“The most powerful determinant of who you are is inside you.(…) She was just a cockney in a nice dress. Until she believed in herself. Then it didn´t matter what dress she wore.” (Limiting belief number two).
And that is why I dedicate so much time working with my clients on beliefs we hold because belief is not the truth, it is just a thought we repeated to ourselves so many times that it became our truth.
“But when my own mother didn´t believe in me, I stopped believing myself”. (The importance of the parent’s role in a child’s life.)
As the author later writes — “None but ourselves can free our mind”, so do we, after working together, find a way to move from limiting beliefs to empowering.
“…we know better now. We can rewrite the story” writes Tara. I have been there, I have done that, I have rewritten my story.
You know why I mostly loved this particular story because I saw myself in it.
I saw myself, a little girl, being scared of my father, being scared to get hurt working on a farm with him. I know, he never wanted to hurt me intentionally, but sometimes he would lose his mind… In so many scenes of this book, I saw myself and I felt what Tara must have felt…
My father grew up in Lithuania under the Russian regime. It impacted how he was raised, and what beliefs he held about what it means to be a man, to be a husband, to be a father.
I love him because I know he did the best he could with the knowledge he had. And I am grateful for every single experience because it made me resilient, real, powerful, loving, and strong. I rewrote my story and became my most favorite person with empowering beliefs and a colorful story not to hide from but use as a tool to show up for those who need showing up for.
Thank You Tara for sharing your story, you inspire me to learn.
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